Tag: anger

Letting Go of “IT”

Sue Siebens

How many times have we heard or thought to ourselves, “just let it go”?  Don’t be angry forever, let it go.  Don’t be anxious or fearful, let it go. If we could just wash it off in the shower, or cough it out like a puff of smog, that would be one thing. But we can’t seem to be rid of these unwanted emotions like sweaty clothes.

We want to forgive and forget, but we still remember with the same angst, the same pain, the same regret when something triggers that emotion again.

Often we are told to “feel your feelings”, with the implication that if we feel them correctly they will go away.  But what does that mean? Feel what and where.  Feel it through the tear and terror? feel it so completely that we drown in tears? Argh, so frustrating because it never seems to work.

It never seemed to work because we didn’t have all the instructions.

It turns out that regulating emotions effectively and permanently is a precise protocol. 

First you have to be in the emotion. Let the emotion pass or try to manufacture one and it doesn’t work. Then close your eyes and feel the physical sensations in your body.  Let these sensations evolve and change until they dissipate. This lasts from 2 seconds to 2.5 minutes. And viola! The emotion is gone.

It’s too simple really.  Its so deceptively simple that one can easily step off the “script” and suddenly your back to wallowing in fruitless ventures.

But when followed correctly it works. Amazingly, it works.

And sorry, this little snippet of the protocol doesn’t give enough information about what not to do.  You’ll need just a little more instruction or the assistance of a professionally trained person.

But YES, all you have to do is “Feel the Feelings”, but not the ones in your mind.

A big THANK YOU to Luc Nicon and TiPi for creating this protocol to set us free!

I’ve been working with Emotional Regulation with the Tipi protocols for almost a year now.  I know it doesn’t seem like a very long time. But I’ve personally experienced and seen in my clients, positive changes that have left me surprised and astonished.

Emotions, behaviors and somatic issues that have disappeared and not returned:

  • Fear of driving fast
  • weeping in grief for two years; 
    separation anxiety/abandonment of dying family member
  • a sales person’s frustration/anger when caught between company and customer; sales person’s performance/making the numbers anxiety
  • anger when passed over for promotion
  • anger/frustration spouse’s behavior (many of these)
  • being uncomfortable in own body; forgiving an unforgiving self-image
  • fear of being killed/shot
  • sports performance anxiety and injury/recovery fear
  • Migraine
  • asthma; phlegm over-production
  • procrastination (many of these); avoidance
  • pain in joints and arthritis
  • family trauma
  • anger/rage at “nothing”
  • fear of meeting new people/making new friends/fitting in
  • fear and paranoia at work
  • idiopathic stomach pain after eating 
  • and more

It’s crazy how well it works!

If you have an emotion, behavior or chronic physical issue to resolve, try Emotional Regulation with TiPi.  

I offer session in-person in North Dallas, Tx or on-the-phone.  Here is a link to schedule and appointment with  me.  http://regulatingsense.schedulista.com/

Don’t let your Emotions control you. Regulate them instead.

Sue Siebens

Seems like every day we have them. Emotions. We react emotionally to the personal interactions and circumstances that we move through each day.  Some emotions we like: joy, happiness, gratitude, hope, inspiration, pride, serenity, inspiration, and, of course, love. Want them. Want to keep them.  

But it seems that much of the time we are swamped by emotions that we don’t like: anger, disappointment, frustration, annoyance, apathy, sadness, discouragement, despair, jealousy, fear, anxiety and guilt.

We spend quite a bit of time and money trying to figure out why we have these unwanted feelings, discovering the reasons they have erupted in us and devising how we can “overcome” them.

I have recently come to a new understanding about emotions and how they work for us and how we can work with them in a more effective way.

Emotions are a set of physical sensations in our BODY. If we work with the sensations in our body is a precise way, the emotions will be resolved permanently.

That’s it. That’s all of it.

It is our MIND mind that labels the physical sensations as anger, disgust, sadness, surprise, fear, trust, or joy, for example. And it is our mind that works out what our action/reaction should be. It’s all downhill, or up-hill from there. In many ways, it’s a distraction from the real work, especially when the reaction is “over the top/beyond what is appropriate”.

It all starts with the physical sensations in our Body.

Our Body is innately equipped with the ability to regulate emotions. When have an we experience a set of physical sensations and if the emotion is not “blocked”, the “emotion” information is passed to the mind, followed by clear-minded, analysis of the situation and discerning action ensues. We won’t actually experience the emotion in this case.  

But, when the emotion is blocked for whatever reason, the Mind “creates” a heightened experience and labels the feelings as “xxx” (an emotion.) Because the Mind is now flooded with overwhelming and sometimes conflicting cues, it’s normal mental flows are sidetracked from “appropriate action”. We then find ourselves in difficulties and behaviors that are over the top and, most commonly, don’t address anything that needs to be taken care of.

For example, if we are not afraid of heights, we could walk up to a handrail in the middle of a tall bridge and calmly recognize that we are safe when we look over the handrail and down to the river view below. There is no “emotional” reaction to the approach of the handrail or the view.

If we are afraid of heights, we may not even get to the middle of the bridge, much less the handrail. Our Mind is probably screaming in a fear and terror that paralyzes the body and reason. I’m sure you’d agree that this is definitely and emotional difficulty.

So the first question is: Do we really need to know how the emotion was blocked?  do we care if the block came from a childhood trauma, a teenage wound or an extremely stressful event, such as wartime combat, a natural disaster, or sexual or physical abuse.

The answers to “where did they come from” may help us to be more compassionate with ourselves. But they don’t help us get rid of the emotion, the reaction to the triggering situation or our mismatched actions.

The second question: it is okay, and possible, to just get of the emotional response, without knowing where it originated, and get rid of it permanently?

Yes, it is absolutely possible to free ourselves from emotional difficulties whether we know where they came from or not.

Hallelujah!

Emotional Regulation is set of precise protocols developed by the TiPi organization (tipi.pro) to resolve emotions and their triggers that clouds our understanding of what is happening now, and filters our abilities to function and respond effectively to the present.

By consciously experiencing physical sensations in the Body, letting them change or shift, until they are gone, a natural and permanent regulation of the emotion takes place. 

We can perform this action on ourselves in the moment the emotion is present in us (TiPi-Self), assist others to do this work in the moment (TiPi-Direct) or afterwards with the help of an Emotional Regulation Professional (TiPi-Deferred).

There are other advantages to Emotional Regulation.  There is no re-triggering or re-living the trauma. We don’t have to know where it originated. There is no need to share personal details or difficult stories. We are completely safe, present and in control at all times during a session.

Emotional Regulation with Tipi sessions rarely need to exceed 30 minutes to obtain a complete and permanent resolution.

I have so many clients that are delighted with the sessions and results of their Emotional Regulation. I am also gratified, personally with my own work and professionally with the work of my clients.I invite you to give it a try, in-person in North Dallas, Tx or on-the-phone.  Here is a link to schedule and appointment with me.  http://regulatingsense.schedulista.com/